An In-Depth Investigation Into the Dark World of Celebrity Instagram Husbands

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    There’s an old saying that reads, Behind every cute girl on Instagram, there’s a sad guy with a camera. And a brick wall. 

    Such is the dark underbelly of the world of Instagram stars. For every perfectly-posed photo, every coffee cup held up in front of a sunset, every bafflingly flattering bikini pose, every outfit flat-lay, there is a process to creating those photos that would make an innocent picture-taker gasp. 

    These are the Instagram Husbands of the world. The men whose phones don’t even have room for the Maps app because of the volume of their camera roll. The men who know how to position a skinny arm. The men who instinctively shudder every time they see an outdoor mural or whitewashed brick or anything marble-print. The men whose thumbs are permanently deformed because the shutter button’s placement on the iPhone makes no ergonomical sense. 

    Maybe you’ve heard of these people. Maybe you’ve heard rumblings of their hidden lives. Maybe you’ve seen the PSA. Maybe, just maybe, you’ve caught a glimpse of them in a reflection that the offending Instagrammer failed to FaceTune out. But what you probably didn’t know is that this secret society exists not just in Portland, or Chicago, or in your neighbor’s living room. It exists in Hollywood, too. 

    These are the Celebrity Instagram Husbands. 

    They are brave soldiers who, while their careers are white-hot, languish behind the lens in their relationships. They capture endless snaps of their wives and girlfriends as they pose high on their tippy-toes than biology ever thought possible. They are…

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